Wayne Allyn Root has been shilling for Donald Trump throughout the 2024 campaign — even more so than usual — so he was pretty much orgasmic when Trump won. But first, a little self-aggrandizement, courtesy of his Nov. 9 WorldNetDaily column:
OK, first things first. I have to take a victory lap. Muhammad Ali said, “It’s not bragging if you can back it up.” I can back it up.
I was the only TV host in America to stick his neck on the line and boldly predict a Trump electoral landslide AND a popular vote victory.
I also promised this election would be a repeat of Reagan-Carter in 1980 – dead even for many months, polls showing a tie, and then suddenly on Election Day, a landslide.
How did I know? Simple. “It’s the economy, stupid.” It never changes. My friends and fans are hurting. Every small business owner I know is hurting. Kamala Harris and her team (let’s call them “The Washington Commies”) wrecked the economy.
Harris never had any solutions, simply because she’s the problem. She only feels your pain because she’s the one causing it. She and poor “brain-dead Joe” created the worst inflation of our lifetime. The voters understand only the billionaire who builds skyscrapers in Manhattan can fix it.
Root then demanded that his worship of Trump be forced on the entire coujntry:
Now to the two things that should happen right away.
Not on Jan. 20, 2025. That’s the day Trump swears in. I’m guessing Trump has that list already written and ready to go.
I literally mean TODAY.
First, we should all start planning for President Trump to be added to Mount Rushmore.
The guy just became the G.O.A.T. – “the greatest of all time.” The greatest legend ever. The greatest comeback kid ever. The greatest winner ever. The greatest politician ever. The greatest Republican ever (move over, Reagan). The greatest salesman ever. The greatest marketer ever. The most unstoppable and relentless human of all time. The list is endless.
No one has ever done the things President Trump has done. And now a landslide!
Just stop arguing. There’s no longer any debate. Trump is amazing. Trump is remarkable. Trump is superhuman. The man belongs on Mount Rushmore.
Or maybe give him his own mountain: “Mount Trump.” I like the way that sounds.
Besides, I want to see the faces of the hosts on CNN, MSNBC and “The View” when they hear my plan!
Root followed that with a more stupid suggestion:
Secondly, here’s something for Trump to do immediately while he’s waiting around for Jan. 20: Trump should offer his gigantic Trump private jet to all the hysterical Hollywood celebrities to fly out of the USA and promise to never come back.
You like that idea? I’ll chip in for gas. How about you?
Robert DeNiro, you’re first. Where do you want to go? Cuba? Venezuela? China? Haiti? Iran? Zimbabwe?
Or maybe Gaza? I hear Hamas has a nice rooftop waiting for you!
Oprah, you’re next. Beyonce. Harrison Ford. Whoopi Goldberg. Bruce Springsteen. Rachel Maddow. The list is long. You all need to go.
And while Trump’s at it, why not offer a fleet of private jets operating 24/7 to fly all the anti-Israel protesters out of the USA. Give them a free one-way trip to Gaza. As Bill Maher the liberal TV host would say, “New Rule: If you like Hamas so much, then you have to go live with Hamas.”
This is going to be a great four years coming up. I can feel it. How about you?
Root concluded with a weird ode to right-wing masculinity:
And the biggest winners of all? MEN.
I’m talking about real men. That kind of man woke up and voted in massive numbers for Trump. White men. Black men. Latino men. Union men. Young men. Garbage men.
This was the year of the macho male. This was the election of the macho male. No more kicking us around. No more using us for target practice. We’ve had enough and we’re not going to take it anymore!
Trump just made men great again.
And to all the men who voted for Harris, I urge Trump to offer free testosterone shots and a hug from mommy.
Now let’s go make America great again. MAGA.
Root didn’t explain why Trump’s record as a rapist and convicted felon makes him a “macho man” anyone should admire or emulate.
Root’s orgasmic myth-making continued on his Nov. 15 column:
No Republican has ever done what Donald J. Trump has done. Not even close.
Simply because no Republican has ever won three presidential elections, just to officially win two!
Yes, Trump won the presidency three times.
And he did it up against the entire world! Trump had to beat the entire Democratic Party, the entire deep state and D.C. swamp, globalists, communists, fascists, pretty much every corporate CEO and billionaire on earth, the mainstream media, social media, Silicon Valley, Hollywood, Wall Street, the entire judicial system, the entire education system (from teachers unions, to public schools, to colleges), even the RINOS in his own party, and at times, even Fox News.
Holy cannoli!
Wait, it gets better. Superhuman Trump single-handedly defeated, knocked out of power and forced into early retirement the Clinton Crime Family, Biden Crime Family, Obama Crime Family, Harris Crime Family, Bush Crime Family, Cheney Crime Family, Romney Crime Family and McCain Crime Family.
Not to mention the humiliating beatings he’s given to Nancy Pelosi, Paul Ryan and Mitch McConnell.
Holy crap!
Speaking of holy crap, Root is still clinging to the conspiracy theory that Trump won in 2020:
Now to that other Trump presidential run in 2020. Some might argue what Trump accomplished in 2020 was just as impressive.
In a supposed “losing effort,” Trump received the most votes of any Republican in history, the most votes of any sitting president in history, and the biggest increase in votes for any president in history.
Trump’s 2024 vote total is now approaching 76 million – just about 2 million more than his record-setting 74 million in 2020. He just became the only president in history to increase his vote totals in three consecutive campaigns.
[…]Trump’s landslide victory two weeks ago is further proof positive that he won in 2020 but the election was stolen from him. Biden clearly benefited from the COVID crisis, expanded COVID mail-in voting rules and 10 to 20 million fake mail-in ballots without voter ID, for voters who never existed.
So, Trump really did win three presidential elections!
Trump really is the G.O.A.T. What he has accomplished has never happened before and will never happen again.
Move over, Ronald Reagan …
Donald J. Trump is the greatest Republican president ever.
If he doesn’t prove to be, of course, don’t expect Root to admit that fact.